Not all lovers come with instructions like me.

Express-o Coffee Scrub

€19.95 EUR

Meet my new no mess, scrub express.

Not all lovers come with instructions like me.

Avoid people who include too many gym selfies, ask for nudes in the first 2 minutes and start conversations with ‘I’m going to bed, what r u up to?’

 

Boys. There isn’t a shortage of them. Remember that, babe.

 

Copy + paste. Saves time.

 

D**k pics may appear. Don’t pick up what they’re putting down.

 

Eat. Because tummy rumbles aren’t fun.

 

Flirt but no like Reese Witherspoon in any Reese Witherspoon rom-com.

 

Give up. That’s what’ll be going through your head. Don’t.

 

Housemates. The be all or end all of all sleepovers. You have been warned.

 

Injuries, happen to hearts and beds. Both mend.

 

Jokes, tell them.

 

Keep is simple. Don’t pretend, overextend or fake it.

 

Leave them hanging. Give a little taste, leave a lot to question.

 

Make a date. The earlier, the better.

 

No. Can always be said. Because when you know, you know.

 

Open. Keep your mind that way.

 

Patience is key babe. Some people take a while to come out of their shell.

 

Queen, that’s you. Don’t let the date run you.

 

Red lipstick says: no kissing or mess me up. Know your line.

 

Slip into something comfortable or into me. I hear my Express-o scrub works fast when you need to look good.

 

Talk. Hello is a good start.

 

Underwear. It’s optional.

 

Voice. Use it, don’t hide behind flirting eyes and nods.

 

Worry less, act more.

 

XXX might be a kiss might be more.

 

You up?’ Is the biggest come down.

 

Zippers. Don’t forget to do them up.

 

Happy hunting, babe.

frank x

Express-o Coffee Scrub

€19.95 EUR

Meet my new no mess, scrub express.

Not all lovers come with instructions like me.

Express-o Coffee Scrub

€19.95 EUR

Meet my new no mess, scrub express.